Black Heart

black lady secrets

She had a black heart,

Black as coal.

Cold as a moonless winter.

Wrapped it around her victims,

Strangled them left them for dead.

But they rose up

Sent her an evil lover

To wrap his dark mind around hers,

Rip out what was left of her black heart.

and he left her as a voiceless puddle,

Slowly oozing into the sewer. 

Such are the rewards of such a heart.

Guard yourself well 

Before you join her.

 

 

Welcome little spy

get smart phone

You think I don’t see you?

You think I am naive.

Slinking around on your belly

while your curiosity you relieve

Say hello to your little friends

I know they are here too.

I know you see

By the things that you do.

You are silly and strange

Bought really cheap

Information you arrange

To send them you creep.

The stalker can’t do it

The law won’t allow

So you do it yourself

You idiot cow.

 

 

False Friends get found out

false friends

I just don’t get some people. Why would you be friends with someone then turn around and pull something you know that will destroy that friendship? Lying is one of the cardinal sins in a friendship. If you lie to someone that cares about you then you are just telling them they aren’t worth the truth. If that is the case then don’t be friends. This is particularly hard when someone you valued and are close to does something so egregious that an enemy would be better. It is a shame that you have to be careful around people and what you tell them. Also who you trust. Be cheap with trust. Don’t give it away for free. I have seen my friends heart broken by this. People they thought they could trust with deep secrets go and smear them on social media. What greater betrayal is there?

Some also lie over and over again to the point of putting another person at risk. How shameful. Why lie? What can you possibly be getting out of it? To make yourself better? Your friend loves you however you are. To get out of responsibility. If you are a true friend you should never have gotten in that position in the first place.

To end this, when you are friends with someone be true friends or end the friendship. It is the only honorable thing to to. If your gut tells you that a friend is untrue to you or cannot be trusted go with your instincts. Your soul can feel betrayal.

For my wonderful true friends you have no idea how much I treasure you and your friendship.

Sisters Not

time like a sword

Through the murky layers of time I remember you,

The one that was my rock was so true.

A friend forever at least that was what it seemed.

We talked together, shared our dreams.

From a distance we became close,

Like sisters I thought.

promises

Until the day you turned I saw the face,

the true face in the place,

Of the one I thought I knew.

 

 

 

Why don’t they see the truth.

betrayed by love

A sociopath and a narcissist are masters at acting. When they are reeling you in you are the most wonderful, smartest gorgeous thing they have ever known. They live for your every breath, they are your slave. Whether they are a friend or lover they are the absolute best there is. Of course they are they are playing out your every fantasy. With an uncanny ability to see the vulnerable parts of you they hone in on those and mirror the very fantasy you are living in your head. We all have those. We want to be smart, beautiful, unbelievably sexy, the world in which they revolve and orbit. They practice it from the time they are children to manipulate the world they live in. The world to them is just their playpen. The people but dolls to use like Barbie and Ken. They have little to no feelings so they need to project them onto victims. Thrills and feelings are very hard for them to achieve. That is why a lot of them practice BDSM and other sexual practices. It is the only way they can feel. All you are to them is a vehicle to get satisfaction in a world that holds little for them.

They are also very good at being a victim. Their last relationship. Oh they are heartbroken, defeated need your love to be whole again. They were abused, cheated on.  You will never meet them. You will never really know the truth.

Then they will isolate you. You are the object of their adoration. Why would you need anyone but them. They might even use money as a tool. If they have it they talk you into giving up work, a career anything to make you more dependent. Once you are then they turn because you are now trapped.

Why do people fall for this? Because they can sniff out the needy, vulnerable and empathetic. They use those traits to pull you in. They feed on them much as a vampire does on the blood of their victims. Even if you don’t have those traits are a strong being they know what is missing they are like blood hounds on the hunt. Everyone has a vulnerability. It could just be a curiosity about an alternative lifestyle. Once they click on that they have you. They can now use this information to embarrass and destroy you.

Part of the entertainment value of the victim is also in destroying them. You need to be destroyed to make them a victim in someone else’s eyes. I had a friend like this she fooled me and she fooled a lot of other people. Looking back I am appalled at how much I believed. I really thought she was a friend for life. When I saw the truth and disengaged from her I was attacked and she attempted to destroy me, my reputation and also that of my friends. She used other people to get to all of my friends as well and destroy them when they saw through her act. It happens.

So let this be a cautionary tale. That person you just made friends with is sending gifts, giving fabulous compliments? Could be they are really nice people. It could also so be they are sociopaths or narcissists. It is easy to fall in their traps. Look at their past relationships. Did they part quietly? Are they still friends with exes or are they on a path to destroy them?

Before you judge the victims of narcissists and sociopaths look deep inside. We all have psychic wounds, needs what makes you so different?

Facebook Fascination

Betty White FB

via Funny Facebook Banners – Bing Images.

Facebook 1.35 BILLION active users, 72% of adults are on Facebook once a month, active daily users 864 million. What is the draw? How come we spend so much time on that site? Whole communities are alive and are busy every day. Some of our friends there are more real than the ones in real life. Is it because we can really be what we want? Share as much or as little as we want to? Express ourselves? Get validation from people when we don’t get it that much from the world around us?

MySpace once the juggernaut of social media now is a music sharing social network. Google + seems to not really encourage social interaction that I can see. Many other social networks have sprung up and yet Facebook remains the standard and the leader. Even after policies which have made it less social, the pushing of Fan pages which really are worthless in a social environment. People who at one time could be their pets or other characters must now use their “real” names. Never mind that most of them are made up. Some can have three or four in their “real” names just by changing them around a bit and getting a new email account.

Since going public with shareholders the advertising has really run amok. Posts pop up in the middle of news feeds selling things that Facebook from watching you thinks you want. It is all getting a bit creepy really. My news now is coming from “pages” that I have no idea who is behind them. Pages allow people to hide behind them. You can say or insinuate anything you want to from a page. The truth usually has nothing to do with it. Hideous things are on pages but because of “free speech” they are allowed to infiltrate the Facebook experience.

Bullies do what ever they want, attack anyone they want, take pictures from peoples profiles and use them without any permission. I will no longer publish any pictures of myself as they have been used to attack me. It has happened to several of my friends as well. Nothing is done.

Sooner or later there will be another social network. One where once again we can be social unmolested by people that get their kicks from denigrating others. Remember when AOL was the only browser around?? It is only a matter of time before Facebook is challenged. I doubt they really care. They now have their advertising engine which will keep chugging around with or without most of us. Younger people are already leaving in droves for Snapchat, Instagram and others. It will be very interesting to see what the future brings.

Mad you say? But aren’t we all???

Johnny Depp screwy

We all have our own little quirks but can usually work within society without a problem. There are some though that have extreme personality disorders. Seems that Narcissism has been the theme of late so I decided to look into the differences between Narcissists, Sociopaths and Borderline Personality Disorder and discovered some interesting things.

Narcissists and Sociopaths both are people with extreme personalities.

Narcissist
The word comes from the myth of Narcissus a Greek youth who fell in love with his own reflection in a pool of water and turned into a flower.

self involved, vain and selfish
problems in sustaining relationships
lack of empathy
hypersensitivity to perceived insults even where they don’t exist
detests non admires
bragging and exaggeration ones own achievements
claiming expertise in many things
denial of gratitude
lack of respect
agressive

A certain amount of narcissism can be a good thing but when it is excessive it becomes a mental disorder classified as NARCISSISTIC PERSONALITY DISORDER.

Sociopath

 

A narcissist is not always a sociopath but a sociopath is always a narcissist.
A sociopath is one suffering from an antisocial personality disorder
A narcissist is not always a social threat but a sociopath is most of the time.
Sociopaths are usually charming people the most interesting thing about a Narcissist and a Sociopath to my mind is that they cannot feel the same way that a “normal” person will. There is not empathy or sympathy they simply cannot feel either. Since they cannot feel they usually have little or no guilt about their actions. They also have a high threshold for excitement and will do more and more extreme things so that they can feel anything.

Borderline Personality Disorder

 

This is the most serious of the disorders and can be confused with Narcissism and Sociopathy

Desperate attempts to prevent abandonment
Unstable relationships with others seeing them as flawless and then as worthless
Highly unstable self image
Self destructive behavior such as reckless driving or drug and alcohol abuse
Suicidal thoughts or behaviors or threats
Emotional states that fluctuate from a few hours to a few days
Feelings of emptiness
Inappropriate intense anger or trouble controlling anger
Episodes of paranoia or dissaciation
Impulsivity

I hope this clears up the differences between these disorders. If you find yourself in a relationship with someone that has these symptoms then get help. If the person won’t get help then you probably should stay away as these disorders tend to get worse in time and with the use of self medication.

Seven deadly sins Jealousy is it worth it?

Jealousy hammered

To just expand a bit on my last post Sexting is it Cheating.

Do you think Jealousy is a useful or useless emotion?

It causes some really destructive behavior, it can destroy friendships and relationships.

When a person isn’t happy in their relationship or their situation in life people look to find a reason. Your partner cheats? Well it must be an outside influence can’t be your partner after all you own that person how dare someone else try to steal them. Never mind that you don’t own anyone they have to be true to you of their own volition. If not the other person is just a smoke screen to what truly is going on in your relationship.

When a person isn’t happy with their station in life. You have a small apartment they have a big house. Never mind what goes on behind those walls. The other person might only have that in their lives. It could be they work harder, longer and smarter than you do. You want that big house, fancy car, clothes, jewelry, travel opportunities? Go out and get it. Find something that allows you to be in that place don’t waste your time envying them for what they have it has nothing to do with what you have.

When a person has more friends than you do. Why? Maybe they go out of their way and do things for others you don’t. They may make time to help other people out or listen to their troubles. A person just doesn’t attract friends without any reason. We want to be with others. Those that reflect our values, our interests. Try a hobby or a class or just be kinder to others. If you treat the person that has more friends with kindness maybe you will have their friends as well. It isn’t a competition.

When people have better health. Do they walk more than you do? Visit doctors more often? Refrain from over drinking or eating? Ask yourself what you can do to improve your own health and state of well being.

We all get jealous. It is part of human nature it spurs us on to do better and be better than we are. It is when Jealousy goes beyond reason or is turned inward that it becomes destructive. Use it to push forward don’t let it push you backwards.

You cannot control what another person does you can only make yourself better. If your partner cheats then look to them not the other person. Find out the reason and fix it or kick them to the curb. The amount of money or things does not make a person, the soul and heart does. If you fixate on material things that is what you will achieve but at what cost? Focus on your own health and well being. Live your life as authentically as you can to achieve happiness.

That other person that you envy may envy you. They may not be what you perceive they are and it is really irrelevant to your own life.

Hope this helps keep that green eyed monster at bay. Thanks for reading and enjoy your day!!